It's so ironic. I have none of people to talk to, but I know why, they're just too busy with their own things and yeah.. maybe I should talk to myself like an idiot or write some shit of my head. No, I have no diary or something like that. That's so old school, but I like the concept. But now I am digitaly writing on this old blog. Same thing.
Sometimes I think, "God, why this shit is happen to me? I don't even know how to solve those problem."
But God never answers the question. Well.. Sometimes I wish I could lose my mind or please just take this soul, I don't wanna live this life like this.
Do you ever feel like there's no one wants to talk to you? Talk about anything inside your head?
Do you ever imagine like there's no one wants to even listen to your deepest heart? There's no one wants to try to understand your heart?
And now I'm about to cry, crying a night long and sometimes hoping someone would come and ask, "are you okay? Don't hurt your own heart, I'll help to cheer you up."
Crying is stupid thing. I know that one. But now there's nothing to do to say. I've had enough.
Do you ever feel like there's a big storm in your heart and it makes you so scared about life?
Maybe I'm the only one person who will die to get the peace in me.
'Cause now I'm in underpressure. I need to make myself warm. Maybe alone is bad idea but I have no other choice.
This is a big deal, so complicated but I have to fix this with no one wants to even understand me.
I don't know when I should stop to cry. But maybe it's not gonna happen to me. I don't know.
I have none to support me. I have none to talk to. I have none to share with. I have none unless myself.
Life is life.
I am so hopeless and lonely. And thanks for making me like this.
With love and tears around myself,